Die-Screaming reviews Lee Roy Meyers’s new Game of Thrones porn parody…
Game Of Bones: Winter Is Cumming (2013)
In a fantasy world of kingdoms, undead, ice monsters, dragons, and a whole lot of humping. Everyone is playing the game to win a seat on the Iron Bone! In this wickedly funny parody of the dramatic hit television and book series, Game Of Thrones. You’re always one move away from getting screwed! Now fans can enjoy the hardcore action that, until now, has remained merely a fantasy!
Studio: Zero Tolerance Entertainment
Director: Lee Roy Meyers
Starring:
- Dahlia Sky
- Dana DeArmond
- April O’Neil
- Claire Robbins
- Anikka Albrite
- Aaliyah Love
- Tanya Tate
- Anthony Rosano
- Tommy Pistol
- James Deen
- Aaron Wilcox
Game of Bones: Winter Is Cumming is a porn parody that any Game of Thrones fan can appreciate. While it is full of pretty much wall-to-wall hardcore sex, director Lee Roy Myers does find the time and take the care to include frequent tongue-in-cheek reference to the source material. A lot of people were wondering how anyone could even make a Game of Thrones porn parody, as the show (and book) is already filled with so much sex. In Game of Bones, that question has been answered perfectly.
Game of Bones is based mostly on the second season of HBO’s Game of Thrones. The film contains six sex scenes and features a pretty impressive cast. And while it would be impossible to parody all of the characters that appear in the show, Lee Roy Myers does a really good job of including several of the more interesting ones. The end result is a porn parody that delivers a lot of charming humor, while still showing a lot of respect to the Game of Thrones story that it’s based upon.
So before getting to the review, which Game of Thrones characters are featured in Game of Bones? And which pornstars play them? Here ya go…
- Podrick Payne (Anthony Rosano) and his whore (Dahlia Sky)
- Robb Stark (Tommy Pistol) and Talisa Stark (Dana DeArmond)
- Female White Walker (April O’Neil)
- Jon Snow (James Deen) and Ygritte (Claire Robbins)
- Daenerys Targaryen (Anikka Albrite) and Daario Naharis (Aaron Wilcox)
- Cersei Lannister (Tanya Tate) and Margaery Tyrell (Aaliyah Love)
What I liked about Game of Bones: Winter Is Cumming…
As I mentioned above, I really enjoyed Game of Bones. In my opinion, the best thing about this film is the fact that it genuinely offers some intelligent, humorous commentary on Game of Thrones. Which is what a “parody” is supposed to do, but very few porn parodies actually ever bother with. Or get right. Game of Bones does both and does so very well.
Probably the best example of this was the scene with Daenerys and Daario. Daario asks Daenerys to prove that her “dragons” are real and the camera flashes to the sky, where the roles of the dragons are played by two Internet kittens, frolicing with a ball of yarn. Daario then goes on to explain that he needs to be sure, saying, “I met a man once who convinced me to touch his pet dragon. It turned out to be his penis.”
I also liked the way that Lee Roy Myers approached the question of, “How and why do you make a Game of Thrones porn parody?” Rather than just ignore the question, the film opens to Tyrion Lannister (Chris Stewart) and Varys (Lee Roy Myers) debating that exact question. As Varys walks off, Tyrion sums it up by saying, “It is a porn parody. At least they can show [dick going into pussy].” Which is the obvious correct answer.
And let’s not forget that first and foremost, Game of Bones is a porn movie. And when it comes to best sex scene of the movie, that honor goes to Tommy Pistol and Dana DeArmond. In their scene, in which they play Robb and Talisa Stark, both give a clinic on why they are two of the best in the business. Not only are they able to deliver the best sex scene of the movie, they also are able to inject a lot of personality as they banter back and forth while Dana DeArmond goes about repeatedly shoving Pistol’s dick down her throat.
What I didn’t like about Game of Bones: Winter Is Cumming…
I think that many of the sex scenes in Game of Bones seemed to drag on at times. And while I completely understand that this is a porn parody and the purpose of which is to show lots of hardcore sex, most of the scenes seemed to last longer than my attention span. I think I would have preferred to see shorter sex scenes, but have more of them so as to provide an opportunity to involve more Game of Thrones characters.
Also, while I am an April O’Neil fan in general, her scene in which she played the “Tight Walker” and performed the solo scene with a dildo just fell flat, in my opinion. The way it was handled just made it feel like an unwanted and uninteresting interruption. just as we think we’re about to see Jon Snow and Ygritte get it on, oh wait, we have to now watch this White/Tight Walker thing pleasure herself with a big, black dildo. I think that was a waste of both talent and a missed opportunity to do something – anything – else with the time.
The bottom line…
Was Game of Bones: Winter Is Cumming perfect? No. That being said, it was an overall entertaining porn parody that showed the people involved had a solid understanding and a genuine appreciation for the Game of Thrones show. Lee Roy Myers has shown once again why he ranks as one of the most celebrated directors in the adult entertainment industry and the cast that he assembled and led for this Game of Thrones porn parody was top-notch. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.
